Having your former lover feel as if you are the devil incarnate can be a difficult pill to swallow. For the vast majority of us, the break up of a relationship is never mutual and for most of us rarely civil.
There can be many reasons your ex has decided to leave you, for the most part her or she has not been completely honest about their reasons for leaving.
Love is an interesting thing and like the old saying goes their is a fine line between pleasure and pain and when it comes to relationships things rings so true!
If you feel that your ex hates your guts then he or she has their reasons and arguing with them about these facts will do little to change their feelings. How someone sees you is difficult to change especially if the emotions run deep and you have caused them pain and grief. The fact is that right now you need to take a few deep breathes and be completely honest with yourself.
It is very difficult to hate someone, chances are your ex still has feelings for you but those have been muddied with feelings of pain and resentment. If your break up was like most, heated and messy, then this could be the reason.
Hate is a strong word and even though it may feel that your ex hates you chances are it is not that extreme. It is very difficult to make someone that once loved you hate you and only you know the possible reasons why he is now hostile and cold towards you.
One of the most common reasons why people feel their ex hates them is because of how they behave after a break up. For a devastated ex, thinking clearly and relationally can be very difficult, we have all been there and know too well about the pain that can hit us like a tonne of bricks.
Post break up behaviour is one of the reason why an ex can do a complete 180 and make you feel as if they hate your guts! Have you been harassing your ex? Do you constantly call them, send them dozens of text messages or emails? Are you following their every move on Facebook and other online networks?
If the answer is yes then your ex is probably harbouring resentment towards you for “not getting the message” and not letting him or her go. It can be difficult to pretend your ex does not exist but right now you have to. Give him or her space and time, keep your distance and whatever you do, don’t add fuel on the fire.
If you know the reasons why your ex hates you such as them finding out you were unfaithful, untrustworthy or deceitful then it can be very difficult to turn it around. Broken trust and faith can leave someone feeling very betrayed and hit with wounds that can take a very long time to heal.
You can’t magically make your ex see you like they once did through words or talking your way to forgiveness or promising change. Actions speak louder than words so it is time to start behaving like someone who deserves your ex’s love and friendship.
The ego is a very powerful thing and when it is dinted and bruised it can feel like hell inside. We all have an ego to a varying extent and this includes your ex. Remember that while your pain is hurting you immensely, your ex may be feeling the same way. Take a few deep breathes, step back, be honest with yourself and don’t try and force your ex into liking and loving you again.
